What does prayer have to do with marriage?
During Jesus’ days on earth prayer had become, on the one hand, the vain babbling of pagan worshippers, or on the other hand, a performance of piety for “righteous Jews”. In the first case, it was the repetition and abundance of words that would appease the gods, who would reluctantly squeeze out a blessing because of the worshipper’s verbal workout. In the second case, it had become a theatrical production for the street corner and the synagogue. It seems that words themselves had became an idol with magical powers over the spiritual realm or it became about elegant wording that become a tool of status in the “church”.
Not much has changed since those days. It seems that much of our prayer lives end up either being for a human audience (even if it’s for us), or as a magical incantation, that if recited properly “in Jesus Name”, or some other verbal rite, would gaurantee blessing. Personally, I have always struggled with prayer as a discipline, much like most of us struggle with dieting and exercise. It has been a mixture, at times, of great pride in my potent and personal piety or it was an area I hoped no one asked about! And let’s not talk about praying with my wife! It has been an on again-off again carousel of guilt or embarrassment.
The Lord’s Prayer has always fascinated me because it seemed either too simplistic or too complicated. Even as a young Christian we were taught to the “ACTS ” prayer as a model, rather than the one Jesus actually gave for disciples. Could it be we have been missing something by ignoring this model? As a side note, I do not believe Jesus called his disciples to recite the prayer as a strict incantation, but I do beleive he intended for us to embrace it as a pattern.
So here was my challenge; to embrace the Lord’s Prayer, on a committed daily basis for the next year. I would do so in the hopes of understanding its depths and exploring its power. The only other detail I added was that this would be, each and every day ,a prayer in a “closet”, meaning without interruption and NOT just on-the-go. My challenge began in January and now, in February, I have already noticed a definite shift in prayer’s personal meaning for me.
The Lord’s prayer is about relationship, at its core, and it is the sum of all the prayers in the Bible, especially the Psalms. Dietrich Bonhoeffer wrote, “It would not be difficult to arrange all of the Psalms according to the petitions of the Lord’s Prayer. We should need to change only slightly our arrangement of the order of the sections” (Life Together and Prayerbook of the Bible: Dietrich Bonhoeffer Works. Minneapolis: Augsburg Fortress, 1996, 177). It lays a relational foundation that will transform ALL OTHER RELATIONSHIPS.
We have made a horrible shift in our day away from relationship, (especially in the religous world) and our marriages have suffered accordingly. Dr. John Gottman, (America’s foremost relationship expert), lists trust and commitment as the “walls” of the Sound Relationship House and “love maps”, really getting to know your spouse’s inner world, as its foundation! Simply put, in our knowledge of God, this is what prayer is actually about!
What Jesus has given is is a distillation of all biblical prayer and a model that allows us to approach God in such a way that simultaneously heals our wounds and moves His heart.
We can divide (my personal approach) the Lord’s Prayer into seven parts;
Our Father…
Your Name Be Holy
Your Kingdom Come…
Give Us…
Forgive Us…
Lead Us…
Close
It’s about relationship!